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“You wanna lick it like a lollipop…”

I watched him gyrate his hips and thrust his ass out at the crowd, clearly loving the shrieks and screams he was getting in return. My face heated up just watching him. I knew those moves a little too well.

I looked at my fifteen-year-old niece beside me, and couldn’t help but smile at her expression. She was young, yes, but not so young that she didn’t know what he was doing, and the blush that was spreading over her cheeks was priceless.

In fact, she was the only reason I was at the concert, in the second row, right there for him to see, if he even remembered. I was pretty sure he couldn’t remember every single encounter he’d had, or every girl he just didn’t call the next day. I was one of many, and I’d made my peace with that long ago.

As I brought my attention back to the stage, I noticed sharp blue eyes almost right in front of me. He was sitting on the edge of the stage now, right in front of where we were standing, and though he was still playing the crowd, his expression seemed confused for a split second. I’m pretty sure it was me he was looking at, because recognition dawned quickly and he smiled, a slow, seductive smile.

Oh God. That was the last thing I needed, the one thing I’d been worried about when I agreed to take my niece to the Backstreet Boys concert for her birthday. I didn’t want to sit this close, where he might actually see me, might actually remember me. I didn’t think I could handle that.

It didn’t help that my airhead sister had booked us in the same hotel the group was staying at, just for ‘fun,’ as she’d said. She was hoping Cammi would get to meet the four guys at some point during the weekend, totally oblivious to the fact that I already knew one of them. Unfortunately, in the biblical sense. I hadn’t argued when she’d told me about the hotel, though, because I wasn’t sure what to say to explain me having a problem with it. I didn’t need her shit anymore than I needed Nick to recognize me.

Nick. Shit. He was hovering near the centre of the stage now, glancing at me once in awhile, never missing a beat in his performance, though. I knew he could concentrate on two things at once when he was on the stage. He knew the show so well, it was so firmly engrained in his brain that he didn’t need to think about it, he just let his body do the work. I suddenly wished that wasn’t the case.

At one point he came back down to sit on the edge of the stage, and he reached out into the audience, dangerously close to where I stood, trying to blend in, to look away, to do something to make him think he’d made a mistake and I wasn’t who he thought I was. No such luck. I was very glad that the rabid fans in front of me latched onto him immediately and he didn’t have the chance to get near enough to me to actually touch me. Thank God for small favours. I tried to stay pressed against my seat from then on, afraid he’d try the same thing again.

When the show ended, and Cammi was safely out of the crush of people, off to the side of the seats, I finally took a deep breath. I’d made it, he’d probably forgotten me as soon as the lights when down and the music stopped, and I could make a clean break for it. I slid my arm around my niece and started to move her toward the exit.

A hand on my arm stopped me. A rather large guy with either olive skin or a really great tan handed me a slip of paper, then turned and dissolved into the crowd. My hand clenched around the paper, crumpling it, knowing exactly who it was from. I needed to get Cammi safely to the car before I dealt with that. My sister would kill me if I let her one and only get crushed by fans at a concert because I was pre-occupied with a one-night stand I’d had a year before.

It took longer than I’d hoped, but eventually I maneuvered us to the parking lot across from the venue, and safely into the car I’d rented for the weekend. As Cammi buckled herself in, I pulled the rumpled piece of paper out of my pocket and glanced at it, at the familiar scrawl I saw peeking out the top of it.

“What’s that, Aunt Mycki?” Cammi asked, glancing over at the paper.

“Nothing, honey,” I said, shoving it back in my pocket. “Just a piece of paper I found on the seat.” I forced a smile. “Let’s get you back to the hotel so you can get some sleep, okay?”

She nodded, resting her head back on the seat. “That was a great show, wasn’t it?” she said, her eyelids getting heavier as she looked at me.

That part I couldn’t deny. These four guys were some of the most dynamic performers I’d ever seen, and before my slight incident with Nick, I’d been enjoying every minute of their show. They had charisma in spades, and had ever since I first started going to their shows when I was 12. Some things never changed.

“I had an awesome time, kiddo,” I said as I backed slowly out of my parking spot, grateful that the crowd of cars seemed to be easing somewhat. I wanted the quiet of the highway, knowing Cammi would put on her iPod and tune me out, the way she always did in the car, just to avoid getting sick. Poor kid.

Half an hour later, we were on the highway, heading toward the hotel. I wasn’t sure why the group was staying so far from the venue, but I was glad to have some time to mull over what had happened at the show. He definitely knew I was there, he recognized me, and he tried to get my attention. The note, still unread in my pocket, was from him, I knew it, but I couldn’t bring myself to read it. Every time I reached for it, I stopped myself and forced my hand back to the steering wheel. That was too big a can of worms for me to open now, especially while I was driving.

What could he possibly want now? Surely not a repeat performance of a year earlier? How the hell did he even remember what I looked like? The guy probably had more sex than even a teenage boy could dream about, and probably with more partners than any porn star could fathom, and yet he definitely knew who I was. That struck me as odd and unsettling. I’d spent so much time trying to forget, hoping he would, too, and it was all in vain. Here he was, as fresh in my mind as he had been a year before.

I hated the little flip my stomach did when I’d looked at him, when I’d realized he knew me, when I remembered what it had been like with him. Gooseflesh rose on my arms just thinking about it. I had to shake my head to keep from driving off the road. I didn’t want to think about it, to get that fluttery feeling. That was the last thing I needed.

We finally pulled up to the hotel and I nudged Cammi’s arm, knowing she wouldn’t hear me with her music going. We gathered our purses and headed into the hotel.

“I’m going to jump in the shower, kiddo,” I said as she flopped down on her bed. “Do you want to find a movie for us to watch on TV?” I went into the bathroom, then poked my head back around the door. “A free movie?” I added, smirking. The kid loved watching pay-per-view movies because they were new releases she hadn’t seen yet, but I somehow doubted her mother wanted to pay $10 or more for a movie in this pretentious hotel.

When the door was safely closed and locked behind me, I reached into my pocket again and pulled out the piece of paper. My fingers actually shook as I unfolded it. I chided myself for being an idiot, and forced my eyes to scan the words.

“Mickey,” it read, “Four Seasons, Room 508. Later?“

Damn him. The little shit didn’t even know how to spell my name right, and probably couldn’t remember what it was short for, yet he was hoping for a quick roll in the hay, something as cheap and meaningless as we’d had before. Well, meaningless to him. There was no way I was getting into that again. I almost hadn’t survived the first time.

I threw the note into the trash can in the corner of the massive bathroom and stripped down to get in the shower. As I stood under the hot spray, I couldn’t help but remember exactly what had happened between us, exactly how much of a shit-kicking my morals had taken that night, and I cringed at the thought. I couldn’t even blame my youth, because 24 isn’t that young. It’s old enough to know better. I burned with shame at the thought of it.

No longer wanting to be alone with my thoughts, I hastened to dry off and throw on my sweats for bed. I wanted Cammi’s idle chatter, her incessant munching on the popcorn I knew she’d probably already dug out of her duffle bag, in preparation for the movie she was probably dying to watch. She was a good kid, and an even better distraction.

Unfortunately, our trip must have taken its toll on the little shit, because when I came back into the bedroom, she was passed out cold on her bed, her Backstreet Boys t-shirt dangling from her hand, over the side of the bed. I envied her innocence, her ability to just pass out and let the world go on around her, without a care in her head. I couldn’t remember when life had been that simple.

I paced aimlessly around the room for a bit, not sure what to do with myself. I’d brought a few books, but they were uninteresting now, a slasher movie was on the TV, but it looked stupid, and there was no way I could put on music without waking Sleeping Beauty on the bed next to me, so I was kind of stuck. I needed to get the hell out of that room.

Grabbing my keycard and my jacket, I quietly snuck out of the room. There was a coffee shop just down the street that was open 24/7, and I figured that was better than sitting in my room, thinking about him, just two floors above me, totally ignorant to the fact that I was in the building. And it was certainly better than wanting to climb those two flights of stairs to bring him up to speed.

As the elevator opened into the hotel lobby, I was met by a swarm of girls, all facing away from me, and I figured the group was just returning to the hotel after the show. Suddenly wishing I’d thrown on a hat or something, I ducked my head and tried to hurry past, hoping he’d be too preoccupied to notice me.

I thought I was in the clear until I reached the doors of the hotel, the doors to freedom, and was caught by the same guy who’d given me the note after the concert. Sighing, I stopped and waited to see what he’d say.

“You can go up to the room,” he said, handing me a keycard. “He’ll be up shortly.”

Anger flashed through me. He honestly thought I’d shown up for the little booty call he’d helped to arrange. I scoffed in his face.

“Actually, I was leaving to get away from him,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest and looking at the keycard with disdain. “I happen to be staying here, but I’m seriously considering switching to another hotel now.” I glanced over my shoulder with a look of disgust at the group of girls Nick was now standing in. “I’m sure he won’t miss me.”

“I just know what I’m told, and he wants you to meet him in his room,” the guy said, shrugging. “No skin off my ass if you don’t want to. Doesn’t happen very often, but whatever. I’ll tell him you’re not coming.”

He brushed past me and went back into the swarm. I watched him go, but I hesitated a bit too long. Just long enough for Nick to look up and see me standing there. I blushed as his eyes met mine, and hurried out the doors.

I practically ran down the street, hoping to get as far from him as possible. I didn’t want him to think I’d shown up there to sleep with him again, at his request. In fact, I didn’t want him to think about me at all. I kept my head down and kept walking, one block, two blocks, ten blocks, I’m not really sure. I just needed distance.

Not long after I’d slowed down, I heard someone running behind me. There was no way it was who I thought it was, so I kept walking. Until I heard my name.

“Mycki! Wait!”

Convincing myself I’d imagined it, and getting a little angry at his presumption, I walked faster down the sidewalk, passing shops and restaurants, all of which were closed at this time of night. Where the hell was that coffee shop? Had I passed it? I didn’t want to stop to find out.

“Mycki!” he called again, closer this time. I knew those long legs would give him the advantage. “Please? Just stop for a sec!”

I sighed and stopped, but didn’t turn around. “Nick, just go away,” I hissed, refusing to look at him. “I didn’t come to the hotel because you told me to, I’m staying there with my niece. I don’t want to see you, so please, just go back.”

“Why did you run from me?” he asked, confusion in his voice. He didn’t sound upset, just curious. He had no idea what he was doing to me, and he probably didn’t care.

“I don’t want to see you, like I said,” I huffed, folding my arms over myself in the cold. My jacket just wasn’t cutting it, but I wasn’t about to go back to the hotel for a warmer one.

“Then why were you at my show?” That puzzled tone was in his voice again, and I cursed his arrogance. Of course he’d assume I came to see him. Why else would I be there?

“I know you’re going to find this hard to believe, but there’s more in this world than just you,” I spat, glancing briefly over my shoulder, but not catching a glimpse of him yet. “My niece wanted to see the Backstreet Boys for her birthday, my sister got the tickets, they happened to be up front. Nothing I could do about it.”

“Will you at least look at me?” he said, irritation creeping out of him. “This is annoying, talking to your damned back.”

“Fine.” I turned around slowly, keeping my eyes on the ground. I couldn’t take those baby blues, not yet. I needed to stay angry. “Better?”

“It will be when you stop staring at the cracks in the sidewalk,” he teased, moving closer to me. I stepped back. “What the hell, Mycki? I thought we had a good time last year.”

“Think about that statement, Nick,” I snapped, my eyes flashing to his face. “Do you know what’s wrong with it?”

He suddenly looked a little awkward, shifting his weight from foot to foot, not looking at my face. He knew what I meant, he got it, and he didn’t know what to say.

“That’s what I thought.” I moved to turn around again, but he grabbed my arm to stop me. I could feel the heat of him through my jacket and sweatshirt. I remembered that warmth all too well. I jerked away.

“What do you want me to say?” he said, getting exasperated now. “I thought you knew what that was all about. Just sex, remember? That was the whole point. I never promised you anything.”

“And I never promised you a repeat performance when you were in town, so leave me the hell alone.” My fingers itched to slap him. I just wanted to put a bright red hand print on that too-perfect face, but I knew I couldn’t.

“Who the hell said anything about that?” he said, shoving his hands in the pockets of his sweatshirt. “How do you know I wanted sex? Maybe I just wanted to see how you were?”

“And maybe terrorists drop bombs to see the pretty lights,” I snorted, my hands rising to my hips as I faced him. Arrogant ass. “Do you even know my last name, Nick? Or, hell, my first?”

He didn’t move for a second, and I could tell he was thinking. I knew for a fact I’d never told him my last name, but I was pretty sure I told him my full name, pretty sure he’d said it more than once during our little encounter. Of course he was drawing a blank.

“It’s been a long time,” he said finally, throwing his hands up in defeat. “And you never told me your last name, that much I’m sure of. But you’re right, I don’t know what Mycki is short for. So sue me.”

“I won’t sue you, Nick,” I said, my words dripping with acid. “I just won’t fuck you again. It’s that simple.”

I saw the shock on his face as I pushed past him and headed back to the hotel. I didn’t want to go where I knew he’d be, but I had to get back to Cammi, to make sure she hadn’t woken up while I was gone. I also needed a private place to let out the tears that were welling in my eyes.