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Thankfully Cammi was still sleeping when I got back to the hotel room. That kid sleeps like the dead when she wants to, and it was just as well for me that night that she did.

I tried to settle in, to go to sleep, but I was beyond restless. Who the hell did he think he was? How cheap would I have to be to go with him a second time, to respond to his audacious request? There was nothing personal about that note, just a room number. No, ‘I’d like to see you,’ no ‘how’ve you been?’, no nothing, just that damned number.

That damned room number that was just two floors above mine. Son of a bitch.

I rolled over for the hundredth time as I thought about how close he actually was to me. I could very easily go up there, couldn’t I? No, absolutely not. There was no way I was giving in to that thought. Besides, he probably wasn’t even alone anymore, having had dozens of options open to him in the hotel lobby when I’d returned. I was willing to bet that this man never went to bed alone. Tonight would be no different.

To my surprise, that idea bothered me more than anything. Of course he’d go and find someone else to have sex with, but why did I give a shit? He’d used me once, had a good time, and thrown me away. It wasn’t like he cared or anything. He just saw an opportunity for another shot at me, and he took it. Typical fucking guy. Right?

But why me? He’d already had his fun with me, why did he want more? I wasn’t that good in bed, for heaven’s sake. Why did he want to be with me again? And why did he chase me from the hotel? What the fuck kind of game was he playing? And why was I even worrying about it?

Frustrated beyond words now, I threw back the bed covers and jumped out of bed. I had too much nervous energy to just lay there, and I knew sleep just wasn’t going to happen. I needed a walk, just a quick one, to clear my head. Maybe I’d head downstairs to the gym, see if it was open 24 hours, burn off some energy on a treadmill or something. Anything to get out of this room and away from my own bad dreams.

I tiptoed out of the room, careful not to wake Cammi, and closed the door behind me. I padded quietly to the end of the hall, to the elevator, and pushed the button. As I waited, I couldn’t stand still. I couldn’t believe the effect this one person was having on me, and I wasn’t liking it much at all.

Finally the elevator doors opened and I hurried inside.

“Mycki?”

Oh for fuck sakes. I rolled my eyes heavenward and turned to face him. How the hell did he end up in this particular elevator at two-thirty in the morning? What were the odds?

“I’ll take the stairs,” I said quickly, grabbing the door to stop it from closing. His hand on my arm made me pause. There was that damned electricity again.

“Please don’t,” he said, his touch becoming a gentle caress on my arm. I jerked away from him, still unable to look up at his eyes. Those eyes got me every time.

“What are you doing wandering around by yourself at this time of night?” I asked, watching warily as the elevator doors sealed my fate and forced me to be alone with him for at least a few seconds. “Shouldn’t you have some big burly guy with you, making sure you don’t get mobbed?”

“This is the only time I get to actually be by myself,” he said, shrugging as he leaned against the back wall of the elevator. “I like to walk the hotel corridors after everyone’s asleep, clear my head a bit before I go to bed.” He studied me closely. “What’s your excuse?”

“Someone pissed me off, so I couldn’t sleep,” I said honestly, not caring about sparing his feelings. He certainly hadn’t given a shit about mine the year before.

“I didn’t mean to piss you off,” he said, keeping his voice low. That tone was not going to pull me in again. I steeled myself against it.

“How did you expect me to react?” I snapped, rounding on him, finally looking up into his face. He was shocked. “Did you expect I’d just take my pants off and let you do your thing again? Once a slut, always a slut, is that it?”

“You’re not a slut, Mycki,” he said quietly, reaching out a hand to me. I moved back.

“Then why did you treat me like I was?”

There, I’d said it, I’d wanted to say it a million times over the past year, and I finally had the chance to get it out.

He didn’t say anything for a second, clearly stunned. I hadn’t meant the words to come out with so much emotion behind them, but they’d been loaded nonetheless. Great, the last thing I wanted was for him to feel sorry for me.

“Is that what you think?” he said finally, as though he were choosing each word carefully. “You think I treated you like a slut?”

“Nick, you fucked me once, and then all but kicked me out of your room,” I said, the memory stinging as it came flooding back. “What the hell did you think I was going to feel like? I was half expecting money on the nightstand, that’s how poorly it was handled.”

He closed his eyes for a second, as though he were collecting his thoughts, but his stance didn’t change. He was still casual, still leaning against the wall of the elevator, still looking like he just didn’t give a damn. I wanted to scream.

“That was never my intention,” he whispered gently, his eyes searching my face, wanting me to believe him. “I thought you knew going in what it was all about. I can’t offer anything else, so I assumed you were okay with that when you agreed to sleep with me.”

“So it’s my fault?” I was two seconds away from letting my anger loose and physically flying at him. I had to take a few deep breaths to get myself to calm down. This wasn’t going at all well.

“That’s not what I said,” he said slowly. “I just didn’t think you’d take it as more than it was. If I’d known you would feel like this, it wouldn’t have happened.”

“Not to me, anyway,” I said, crossing my arms over my chest. “You would have picked some other stupid girl and done the same thing to her. You’re a jerk, plain and simple, and you think you can just have sex and not care about your partner, that that type of shit is okay. You’re beyond selfish, and you don’t care who you hurt, do you? You make me sick.”

My chest was heaving, my body was shaking, and I was pretty sure I was sweating buckets, but I’d had my say. I turned my back on him, not even wanting to look at him anymore. At that point in time, I wouldn’t have cared if Nick Carter disappeared off the face of the earth.

“Myckaila,” he said softly, and I felt his large hand on my shoulder. He did remember after all. Shit. I didn’t want to give in to the sound of my name on his lips, to the way he said it, but I couldn’t make myself shove him away again. The elevator suddenly felt very small, and I felt like I was running out of air. Why the hell wasn’t the damned thing opening? Come to think of it, why weren’t we moving? We should have reached the ground floor long ago. I looked down at the panel on the wall. Sure enough, idiot that I am, I forgot to press the damned button.

“Nick, don’t touch me,” I said as calmly as I could. “I never want you to touch me again. I don’t even want you to let on that you know me, okay? You seem to be good at that.”

“Myckaila, I’m sorry,” he muttered, and this time he was so close I felt his warm breath on the back of my neck. I could feel the heat coming off of him, which told me he was way too close. But I had nowhere to go. I couldn’t make my feet move.

“Don’t call me that,” I said, closing my eyes to regain some sense of composure. “You’re not proving anything by remembering my full name. Just leave me alone, okay?”

“I want to fix this,” he said, one hand going to my arm. Heat spread through me at his touch, despite myself. My breathing sped up.

“You can’t,” I said. “And even if you do, what difference does it make? You’d just use me again tonight and then leave tomorrow, barely remembering my name again. Why the hell would I agree to that?”

“Did you ask yourself why I picked you out of the crowd tonight?” he said, for the first time sounding a bit pissed off himself. “In case you didn’t notice, I wasn’t exactly low on options.”

“I don’t know how your mind works, Nick,” I said, though now he had me interested. It wasn’t like I hadn’t asked myself the same question a hundred times since he’d sent me the note.

The elevator dinged suddenly and the door opened, startling both of us. An elderly couple, looking exhausted, piled in and pressed a button for their floor. I used their entrance as an excuse to escape. Of course, Nick followed me.

“Don’t just walk away, Mycki,” he called as I hurried down the hallway. We were still on my floor, but I didn’t dare go near my room. I didn’t want him there, I didn’t want Cammi to wake up and see him, I didn’t want any part of it. I headed for the stairs at the end of the hallway.

No sooner did I open the door to the stairwell and go through it, than it closed quickly behind me and I found myself pressed against the back of the door, a very warm body holding me there.

“Nick, get the fuck off of me,” I spat, shoving at his shoulders, albeit ineffectually.

“Not until you listen to me,” he said, one hand on either side of my head, his full torso shoved against mine. My heart started to race as I smelled him, felt his warmth, and, against my own better judgment, responded.

“Make it quick,” I said, realizing I wouldn’t get away from him if I didn’t let him have his say. And I needed to get away from him as quickly as possible.

“I recognized you in the crowd tonight,” he started, not moving, his face an inch from mine. “You know I did. You saw me smile at you, and you moved away. You wouldn’t look at me the rest of the night. I was hoping you were playing hard to get, and the truth is, I’d already picked another girl out of the audience to ask back to the hotel tonight. But for some reason, and I don’t even get it myself, I kept seeking you out, watching your reactions, hoping you’d smile at me or something, let me know that you got it, that I wanted you.” He took a deep breath. “I don’t normally just kick women out of my room after we’re finished, Mycki, and I’m sorry that I did that to you. You’re going to think I’m a complete asshole here, but I’m telling you the truth. I kicked you out because I felt more than I wanted to when all was said and done. I don’t need that type of complication in my life, and I knew I had to stop it before it started.”

I looked up into his eyes, wondering if I should believe him or not. Part of me wanted to, part of me wanted to give in, but the sensible part of me, the part that hadn’t gotten over being used like that, told me to laugh in his face. I had to really think back to the year before, to figure out if he was telling me the truth.